I am the kind of person that "feels" loved if I do a good job. Like, at the end of the day if I have done all the things I consider good and important, I feel a nod of approval. I don't realize most days that this nod of approval is totally in my head or psyche or whatever, and not necessarily God smiling down on me...it's just how I naturally feel when all is right and in control in my little world. And then of course the opposite happens as well. If I am feeling tired or crappy, or if I'm feeling fine but just not motivated, then my day might feel like quite the failure because I didn't connect with my kids well or help anyone or even communicate with God much.
So today I was very tired from 2 days away (so fun by the way) and I did absolutely nothing. I am feeding frozen pizza to my family tonight. We watched TV all day. I didn't exercise or have prayer time or take care of the house or visit anyone. But right smack in the middle of all this wonderful laziness, I was watching Veggie Tales with the girls and Jr. Aspagarus sang, "And so, it's good to know You really love me, it's true the Bible says You do, You really love me, Your love was with me all throughout my day." I felt the rush of the love of God, and we all just stopped and worshipped. The girls both were saying "Jesus!" because they felt His presence, too. His love isn't like: "I feel sorry for you, you pitiful thing, yes, just for today I will show you love, but tomorrow you better get with it." In fact, His love was saying to me that even if I had done everything in a day that I know I am supposed to do, it wouldn't have made a bit of difference.
Every day isn't like this. Every day holds "obedience opportunities" and I don't want to miss them. But it is wonderful to know His love is the same, beating strong and overflowing with delight in us...all the time, no matter what. It is the base of all good living.
No comments:
Post a Comment