Our darling Yemisrach has been here in our home for 15 months, and this week I was blessed with a much-needed, fresh perspective on this blessing!Yemi surviving her first 8 and a half months in Ethiopia first of all, and then joining our family is a miracle in itself. She is a sweet, beautiful, smart, and fun addition to our family. Knowing God leaves the 99 to go after the 1 is one thing; seeing Him do it in the physical realm is another, and I have learned so much about that crazy kind of love through our personal experience of adoption. We are so glad God led us to adopt!
However, in the midst of having a 2 year old who screams a lot...who is strong willed...who won't go in nursery (well, she did today for the 1st time ever, thank you Kendra!)...who tends to be negative...some days I have forgotten just how precious and miraculous she is. I've been a little unmotivated in my desire to be the kind of mom I truly want to be. Also, because of the way that I have felt recently, I was nervous about Selah going to school and me being alone with Yemi all day. Then I happened upon a blog by a friend who is in a very difficult phase of their adoption. It broke my heart, because I remember that feeling during our own adoption process of not knowing if God would deliver us/Yemi from the situation or not, and if He was going to, when? There was no Plan B. God would deliver and help, or this dream of being together would end.
As I was reading that blog and interceding for God's movement in their adoption process, I was flooded with thankfulness and relief that I was within earshot of Yemi's screams! The embarrassing fits or aggravating complaints are just proof that she is near me and not on the other side of the world! I have new eyes and ears. I've fallen in love with her all over again this week as Selah has been out of town.
The miracle is fresh and new. I can't believe we are in on it!
What an honest and beautiful post, Lyn. It takes courage to share the ups & downs of motherhood.
ReplyDeleteI know moms that love the two & three year old stage. They find it challenging and exciting. I don't think I'll be one of those moms when the time comes. I like it when their four and above. I like having conversations. Not so crazy about tandrums. Not that I've been a mom just a nanny but hte tandrums made me kinda sorta crazy. For a while I didn't ever want kids. Then I became a nanny for older kids and I relished that! It helped me to know that while I will have a few rough years... this too shall pass. :)