Don't read this if you're not in the mood for a frankness, or if you're not in the mood to consider cutting the budget! :) (It's okay, I get in those moods as well! No judgment here!) Jack calls me Dave Ramsey's long lost love child or something like that, LOL. I was actually reminding myself of some things today about money and thought I'd organize my thoughts in a blog.
1) Have a written monthly budget with every category you could possibly spend, give, or save money in. If you're new to this, guess how much you'll need for each category. Ours are: Bills, Escrow (I'll mention that later), Grocery, Gas, Fun Money, Miscellaneous, Tithes and Offerings, Health. Your plan is to write exactly how much was spent in each category every month and compare to how much you hoped to spend in each category every month. This isn't to make you feel bad for spending, because some things just cost what they cost. But it IS to help us know where the money is truly going and perhaps in some categories some changes could be made. As you go, new categories might need to be made and your expectation of how much should be spent in each category might change, but eventually you'll know the perimeters you need to give and can say, "No, we can't do that, because our ______ money is gone for the month."
2) Here's what the Escrow thing is all about. I thought of all the things that happen for sure in a year's time and added up the estimated cost of all those things. Stuff like: property taxes, gas bill for our heat, car repairs, home/appliance repairs, Christmas giving (for the four of us and for others), and going to the dentist. Those things ARE going to happen, and there's nowhere in my monthly budget for the money to come out of, and that's frustrating! So, I added up the estimated costs of these things for one year and divided it by 12, and that figure is what MUST go into Escrow savings each month. I have a different savings account for Escrow and I transfer that amount at the end of each month. There have been months where I couldn't, when we just didn't have enough, so I understand that happens. But this is a KEY to getting ahead and not always feeling like you can't keep up with life. So when that tax return comes or anything at all, don't spend it! Start an escrow account for those things that WILL happen this year.
3) Health. A few different things.
*First of all, everybody's needs are different and you have to do what you have to do. I never thought I would take supplements, because "can't I get those nutrients from my food?" Well, obviously not. I have adrenal fatigue and my blood work shows how much I need extra and quality doses of things. But there are many supplements and health food type things that I simply cannot afford. I have to give myself a limit and do what is most necessary, honestly for more reasons than just financial ones.
*I love the idea of a gym, but don't think there aren't alternatives! A coat and a pair of shoes is all you need to walk and jog and do intervals outside. Or you and your friends can exchange workout dvds. Even if you have to drive to a place with sidewalks, you'd be driving to the gym anyway so that can't be an excuse.
*Another health issue: Some might have an argument against this, and that's totally cool, but to get free health insurance for children in Kentucky is very easy. As a four member family, if you make an income of less than $44,000, you can be on Passport.
*Also, I'm NO expert on health insurance but if you're fairly healthy, there are plans for health insurance that have a really high deductible (which is the most you could possibly have to ever spend of your own money) but a very low premium (what you pay monthly.) That way, you can save your money for your health needs instead of giving it to those companies, but have the benefit of the "adjustments" you get for your healthcare provider having a relationship with the company.
*Lastly about health I will just say it should be a serious goal to get off any prescriptions possible. There may be a natural source to meet your need and it is likely that it will be cheaper and better for your body. Many of these supplements that can take the place of prescriptions can be purchased as a 6 month or year supply, making them up to %40 off at certain sites. Consider going to a natural medicine minded nurse practitioner...much more cost effective and they can manage your supplement needs.
This is already too long, so I'll do a Part Two in the coming days! If anyone wants to comment and ask a specific question, feel free, and I'll answer it in the next blog. :)
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Two Words God Loves
I wrote on Wednesday about having anger issues. I had just set up camp in a pit of disappointments and all that "should not be." And the next morning, I woke up with the same propensity to go there. But before I could raise my head, the Lord asked me, "Do you want another day like that or do you want help?" What are two words God loves? HELP and ME, preferably in that order!
I asked for help and I felt that I had a choice laid before me: to begin putting good thoughts in and shunning the bad thoughts or pick up where I left off the day before in my ranting and raving. By His help and just the sheer fact that I hated the way I felt, I did the first. Before jumping into school, Selah and I wrote in our journals. I made some lists...that helps my brain work through things so I can be at peace. I started making lists of my disappointments, my responsibilities, my needs, and that really helped, just seeing it all laid out on the page. Just like the Serenity prayer, the Lord helped me to see what I could actually change with a little bit of organization and communication, and what I would have to accept. There were already little changes I could make that eased some of my frustration. The Lord is my help.
Later that day, my friend from out of town called and said she felt like coming up! I was able to talk through my two biggest problems with her, and God helped me by just hearing the words coming out of my mouth. They were words I can't ignore and push down, but they were also words I didn't like, words I refuse to keep repeating or dwelling on. It was how I felt and that's okay...but there's a time to set it aside and put on grace, thanks, perseverance, and joy. The Lord is my help!
The next day I spoke with someone else and here are some tidbits that I'd like to share with anyone who might be reading:
*Never say never. It hasn't happened yet? It feels impossible? Think of Abraham and Sarah. IF it is in the Lord's plans, it WILL come to pass.
*There is a difference between hoping and expecting. I am still chewing on this one, but I think it means that expecting has a demanding element to it and hope has a submission element to it. I hope for many things, but in that hope I submit to the Lord.
*Ask for the Lord's help in moving from being a victim to being a survivor. Be proud that you made it through something, that you are making it through something. That's a positive spin and quite frankly, we deserve it.
The Lord loves it when we ask for help. Keep asking!
I asked for help and I felt that I had a choice laid before me: to begin putting good thoughts in and shunning the bad thoughts or pick up where I left off the day before in my ranting and raving. By His help and just the sheer fact that I hated the way I felt, I did the first. Before jumping into school, Selah and I wrote in our journals. I made some lists...that helps my brain work through things so I can be at peace. I started making lists of my disappointments, my responsibilities, my needs, and that really helped, just seeing it all laid out on the page. Just like the Serenity prayer, the Lord helped me to see what I could actually change with a little bit of organization and communication, and what I would have to accept. There were already little changes I could make that eased some of my frustration. The Lord is my help.
Later that day, my friend from out of town called and said she felt like coming up! I was able to talk through my two biggest problems with her, and God helped me by just hearing the words coming out of my mouth. They were words I can't ignore and push down, but they were also words I didn't like, words I refuse to keep repeating or dwelling on. It was how I felt and that's okay...but there's a time to set it aside and put on grace, thanks, perseverance, and joy. The Lord is my help!
The next day I spoke with someone else and here are some tidbits that I'd like to share with anyone who might be reading:
*Never say never. It hasn't happened yet? It feels impossible? Think of Abraham and Sarah. IF it is in the Lord's plans, it WILL come to pass.
*There is a difference between hoping and expecting. I am still chewing on this one, but I think it means that expecting has a demanding element to it and hope has a submission element to it. I hope for many things, but in that hope I submit to the Lord.
*Ask for the Lord's help in moving from being a victim to being a survivor. Be proud that you made it through something, that you are making it through something. That's a positive spin and quite frankly, we deserve it.
The Lord loves it when we ask for help. Keep asking!
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Anger Issues
Okay, people, this is me "keepin' it real". I recently have discovered that I have some ANGER ISSUES! I am a calm, patient person by nature. I love people and see the good in them, sometimes even when proven otherwise. Most offenses roll off my back. So my anger issues aren't toward people, in fact I'm not sure what or who they are toward!
But I need a punching bag installed in the basement, seriously.
I'm mad about things I should be mad at: national debt, abortion being legal, people with guns who have no respect for human beings, people (whether I agree with them or not) who won't listen or come to a compromise or learn from each other, and last but not least the fact that while this country is in serious trouble, the rest of the world has its own horrors that we have yet to experience ourselves.
And I'm mad about things I shouldn't be mad at: that I have adrenal fatigue and a sleep disorder yet keep expecting myself to live a normal life, consistently landing me in confusion and frustration. That regardless of all the changes I have made in the past three years in exercise, eating an all natural diet, taking supplements, etc., I still struggle with my health and weight. That I am on a not-so-merry-go-round in some relationships although I am doing all I can for peace and joy. That my dog is eating our stuff even though he has toys and bones all the over the house, won't stay in our fence, and sheds plenty of hair regardless of his label as a non shedding dog! That everything costs so much yet doesn't work that well. That I can't live as simple of a life as I want because it's not just me I have to think of. That I can't seem to make time or have energy leftover for being with friends and having fun. That some of my dreams aren't going to happen, they just have to be let go of.
I'm even mad that I feel this way.
Prayer and a punching bag are in order!
But I need a punching bag installed in the basement, seriously.
I'm mad about things I should be mad at: national debt, abortion being legal, people with guns who have no respect for human beings, people (whether I agree with them or not) who won't listen or come to a compromise or learn from each other, and last but not least the fact that while this country is in serious trouble, the rest of the world has its own horrors that we have yet to experience ourselves.
And I'm mad about things I shouldn't be mad at: that I have adrenal fatigue and a sleep disorder yet keep expecting myself to live a normal life, consistently landing me in confusion and frustration. That regardless of all the changes I have made in the past three years in exercise, eating an all natural diet, taking supplements, etc., I still struggle with my health and weight. That I am on a not-so-merry-go-round in some relationships although I am doing all I can for peace and joy. That my dog is eating our stuff even though he has toys and bones all the over the house, won't stay in our fence, and sheds plenty of hair regardless of his label as a non shedding dog! That everything costs so much yet doesn't work that well. That I can't live as simple of a life as I want because it's not just me I have to think of. That I can't seem to make time or have energy leftover for being with friends and having fun. That some of my dreams aren't going to happen, they just have to be let go of.
I'm even mad that I feel this way.
Prayer and a punching bag are in order!
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Living Love Story #4: An Extravagant Giver
God is an extravagant Giver. He is one who likes partnerships and covenants, and His side of those relationships is always the heaviest and the strongest. He brings more to the table than anyone. God is a team player who doesn't have to be, but is, and He is a solid one at that.
And Abram was one of the first to find this out.
I'm looking at Genesis 12 through 17 today and seeing such a personal relationship between God and Abram. God chose Abram, to begin an everlasting covenant with him and his descendants. It was like He had so much to give and just wanted someone to give it to!
In Genesis 12:2-3, God promises to make Abram into a great nation, to bless him and even bless all who bless him (extending His lovingkindness to anyone who is Abram's friend)! He says he will make Abram's name great, and that all peoples on earth will be blessed through him. In Genesis 13:14-17, God shows Abram the great land that He has set aside for Abram's offspring and reminds him that his descendants will be more numerous than can even be counted. Then in Genesis 15:1, God bestows this blessing on Abram: "Do not be afraid, Abram; I am your shield, your very great reward."
He partnered with Abram, asking him to circumcise all the males in his household and raise his children to follow the Lord, because He wanted a people after His own heart, a people He could be close to, a people who could show the world who He was. As we know, those people (just like us) were wanderers from the heart of God time and time again...as was Abram himself (think Hagar, Gen. 16). Yet God continued to come to Abram over and over to renew His covenant with him, as He does with us. Despite serious mistakes with serious consequences, God gave direction, territory, honor, protection, favor, and fruitfulness as undeserved, extravagant gifts. Even when Abram lied, even when Sarah failed to believe, even when we forget what we've been promised and act like orphans instead of deeply loved children in the family of God, even when...He comes and renews His covenant of peace with us, again.
As I was studying this today, this question came to mind: "What has God given to me that I fail to daily take hold of?" It may be a quicker list to ask: "What has God given to me that I DON'T fail to daily take hold of?" The mercies, the fellowship, the acceptance, the voice, the joy, the love. It's all new, every morning.
How do you repay the most extravagant Giver? You take hold of the gifts and enjoy them with all your heart. You let them have the power in your life that the Giver wants them to have. And you let those gifts turn into a blessing for all who know you!
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Living Love Story #4: Walking with God
Adam
Seth
Enosh
Kenan
Mahalalel
Jared
Enoch
Methuselah
Lamech
Noah
There were ten generations between Adam and Noah. In Genesis 5, we have these ten patriarchs of ten families for ten generations. And only two out of the ten were crowned with this specific sentence: "He walked with God."
Enoch and Noah. Two guys who walked with God, several generations apart from each other at that. Two guys who were in step with the heartbeat of God stood out among the hundreds of other fathers, sons, and brothers. Perhaps there were others who knew the Lord well, but they were not mentioned, and also as the generations led up to Noah we are told that man's wickedness on the earth had become so great that He decided to send a flood because quite frankly, a good man was hard to find (Gen. 6:5-7).
God also showed His close relationship with these two in this way: They both were rescued quite uniquely. Enoch walked with God and "then he was no more, because God took him away." (Gen. 5:24) Noah walked with God and God put his family on a boat to survive the flood. Not everyone who walks with God gets a quick and easy departure, or even first dibs on safety in a disaster, that's for sure! But lets just say it's special that He chose to do this for these two who stood out among the many.
God offers a daily walk with anyone who will take Him up on it. We have to realize that! There are not some chosen to be super Christians and the rest of us are left to memorize John 3:16, say a ritual prayer at dinner, and go to church on Sundays because it would feel weird not to. Honestly, it's our choice whether or not we're going to let our life be about Him or not. We can have as much of His presence and direction and hope and joy in our lives as we want...One thing about God that I continually fall in and out of awareness of is that He is an infinite and generous Source! How much I go to Him, how much I draw from His wealth of grace and love is up to me. Ever heard the phrase, "You can lead a horse to water but you cannot make it drink"? Many times we are just standing at the edge of a life changing, thirst quenching River because it would take too much energy, or humility, or something, to get into it and make it our Home.
We each are given one life, and it could be spent doing great things and earning a great name among men...but all that is worthless in the end if we didn't truly know Him through that personal daily walk. I love that this is how God wants it to be! That our life isn't a race to achieve, but rather a journey to be ventured morning by morning, with our eyes not on everyone else's walk but on our own.
Seth
Enosh
Kenan
Mahalalel
Jared
Enoch
Methuselah
Lamech
Noah
There were ten generations between Adam and Noah. In Genesis 5, we have these ten patriarchs of ten families for ten generations. And only two out of the ten were crowned with this specific sentence: "He walked with God."
Enoch and Noah. Two guys who walked with God, several generations apart from each other at that. Two guys who were in step with the heartbeat of God stood out among the hundreds of other fathers, sons, and brothers. Perhaps there were others who knew the Lord well, but they were not mentioned, and also as the generations led up to Noah we are told that man's wickedness on the earth had become so great that He decided to send a flood because quite frankly, a good man was hard to find (Gen. 6:5-7).
God also showed His close relationship with these two in this way: They both were rescued quite uniquely. Enoch walked with God and "then he was no more, because God took him away." (Gen. 5:24) Noah walked with God and God put his family on a boat to survive the flood. Not everyone who walks with God gets a quick and easy departure, or even first dibs on safety in a disaster, that's for sure! But lets just say it's special that He chose to do this for these two who stood out among the many.
God offers a daily walk with anyone who will take Him up on it. We have to realize that! There are not some chosen to be super Christians and the rest of us are left to memorize John 3:16, say a ritual prayer at dinner, and go to church on Sundays because it would feel weird not to. Honestly, it's our choice whether or not we're going to let our life be about Him or not. We can have as much of His presence and direction and hope and joy in our lives as we want...One thing about God that I continually fall in and out of awareness of is that He is an infinite and generous Source! How much I go to Him, how much I draw from His wealth of grace and love is up to me. Ever heard the phrase, "You can lead a horse to water but you cannot make it drink"? Many times we are just standing at the edge of a life changing, thirst quenching River because it would take too much energy, or humility, or something, to get into it and make it our Home.
We each are given one life, and it could be spent doing great things and earning a great name among men...but all that is worthless in the end if we didn't truly know Him through that personal daily walk. I love that this is how God wants it to be! That our life isn't a race to achieve, but rather a journey to be ventured morning by morning, with our eyes not on everyone else's walk but on our own.
Monday, January 7, 2013
Why Sugar Free in 2013?
So, I am really thankful for a fine group of ladies on Facebook that are taking a health challenge with me! Most of us are on slightly different paths, but the thing we have in common is that we are letting go of certain foods/ingredients that we know are bad for our health, but that we tend to over eat. We began our journey over New Years and all of us have different ideas of how long we'll do it. I hope we learn so much from each other that we never go back to unwise eating!
I personally am going without sugar (except what occurs naturally in nutrient dense foods such as fruit) and white flour. I always have tried to stay away from this stuff anyway, because I was raised on a really healthy diet and also because when I found out I had adrenal fatigue almost three years ago, I made specific changes. But sugar, dear, dear, terrible wonderful sugar... I "knew" I couldn't eliminate it so I tried to regulate it. That certainly works for many types of people; I don't think everyone needs to totally cut out sweets. My grandmother eats one piece of chocolate every day. ONE! That gene did not make it's way to me...
So why does it matter so much? I'm sure I'll post more about this later, but sugar really is terrible for our bodies, for starters. Also, I'm sad to say that I have had 34 1/2 years to eat cookies in moderation but have failed! To be perfectly honest, I'm fighting a battle, and it brings more freedom in my life to know I am not eating ANY of the bad stuff as opposed to struggling with myself about HOW MUCH of the bad stuff I can have. I feel like I've already won the battle because I'm no longer bargaining and battling with myself. The answer is "no, not any," instead of having a taste of it and then dealing with the old routine. I think I'm learning from my past tries at moderation that if you do have a problem with sugar, you're only setting yourself up for failure by eating small amounts of it, say, on the weekend, because you're never letting yourself be free of the addiction. This is an issue of our minds and will power but it's also an issue of what our bodies are expecting...If our bodies no longer expect it, then the battle is so much easier.
Silliest example ever, but I was watching The Holiday over Christmas Break and one of leading ladies finally realizes that this guy in her life was poison in disguise, so she writes to him: "Please don't contact me. I know that I need to get over you, so please allow me the chance." As nice as birthday cake and easter egg jellybeans are, I need the chance to get this out of my system and relieve myself of the burden of constantly trying (and failing) to regulate sweets.
I'm going to blog about our journey at least once a month, so stay in touch and feel free to join us.
I personally am going without sugar (except what occurs naturally in nutrient dense foods such as fruit) and white flour. I always have tried to stay away from this stuff anyway, because I was raised on a really healthy diet and also because when I found out I had adrenal fatigue almost three years ago, I made specific changes. But sugar, dear, dear, terrible wonderful sugar... I "knew" I couldn't eliminate it so I tried to regulate it. That certainly works for many types of people; I don't think everyone needs to totally cut out sweets. My grandmother eats one piece of chocolate every day. ONE! That gene did not make it's way to me...
So why does it matter so much? I'm sure I'll post more about this later, but sugar really is terrible for our bodies, for starters. Also, I'm sad to say that I have had 34 1/2 years to eat cookies in moderation but have failed! To be perfectly honest, I'm fighting a battle, and it brings more freedom in my life to know I am not eating ANY of the bad stuff as opposed to struggling with myself about HOW MUCH of the bad stuff I can have. I feel like I've already won the battle because I'm no longer bargaining and battling with myself. The answer is "no, not any," instead of having a taste of it and then dealing with the old routine. I think I'm learning from my past tries at moderation that if you do have a problem with sugar, you're only setting yourself up for failure by eating small amounts of it, say, on the weekend, because you're never letting yourself be free of the addiction. This is an issue of our minds and will power but it's also an issue of what our bodies are expecting...If our bodies no longer expect it, then the battle is so much easier.
Silliest example ever, but I was watching The Holiday over Christmas Break and one of leading ladies finally realizes that this guy in her life was poison in disguise, so she writes to him: "Please don't contact me. I know that I need to get over you, so please allow me the chance." As nice as birthday cake and easter egg jellybeans are, I need the chance to get this out of my system and relieve myself of the burden of constantly trying (and failing) to regulate sweets.
I'm going to blog about our journey at least once a month, so stay in touch and feel free to join us.
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Living Love Story, Week 2: Cain
Oh, Cain. Such a fun character to write about! The third human on the planet who is known for one thing: Killing the fourth. Yet as I read this story once again through the lenses of "how does God reveal His desire for closeness with people?", I find some kindness and truth.
In Genesis 4:4 & 5, Cain and his brother Abel bring offerings to the Lord. God looks with favor on Abel's, but He did not look with favor on Cain's. We aren't told why. I've heard different reasons, such as Abel's offering was an animal so therefore there was blood shed for remission of sins and Cain's offering was from the ground. But I think an offering of the first fruits of whatever line of work one was in was the sacrifice God was after. I don't know, but I do know this: It was no secret to Cain what he had done wrong. In Genesis 4:7, God says to Cain: "If you do what is right, will you not be accepted?"
Sometimes intimacy with God can be downright uncomfortable because we know exactly what He asked for and we chose not to give it. Does it sometimes makes us angry that He sees? Does it sometimes make us jealous of others? What does this tell us about nearness between God and Cain?
*God saw the offerings personally and cared about the motives of their hearts.
*God made it no secret what would please Him and what would not. He wasn't tricky.
*God spoke audibly to Cain after his heart was downcast, with an explanation and a warning.
After Cain killed Abel, a couple other touch points happened between Cain and God. God gives the punishment that Cain will be a restless wanderer, no longer having any luck with farming, and driven from the presence of the Lord. Cain's response is of course despair and he specifically says in verse 13 & 14, "My punishment is more than I can bear. Today you are driving me from the land, and I will be hidden from Your presence." That was no small thing to Cain. He was heartbroken over it. Despite the first murderer in history's actions, this man had a relationship with God! And the last thing God says to him is, "I will protect you." He puts a mark on his head so no one would kill him. A Father showing discipline and mercy at the same time.
I am always saying when we come to a worship gathering, it's not about the music...and it's not. It's about meeting with Almighty God and spending time with Him. When we come together to sing, or when we go alone in prayer, or just as we focus our minds on awareness of Him throughout the day, we are exercising the most awesome privileges in history because we are welcomed into the presence of God, where our hearts will be seen and personally known. He will speak, He will ask things of us, and we will have a chance to respond. He is a loving Father with a perfect balance of discipline and mercy, and because of Jesus, if we accept Him, we would never lose His friendship.
In Genesis 4:4 & 5, Cain and his brother Abel bring offerings to the Lord. God looks with favor on Abel's, but He did not look with favor on Cain's. We aren't told why. I've heard different reasons, such as Abel's offering was an animal so therefore there was blood shed for remission of sins and Cain's offering was from the ground. But I think an offering of the first fruits of whatever line of work one was in was the sacrifice God was after. I don't know, but I do know this: It was no secret to Cain what he had done wrong. In Genesis 4:7, God says to Cain: "If you do what is right, will you not be accepted?"
Sometimes intimacy with God can be downright uncomfortable because we know exactly what He asked for and we chose not to give it. Does it sometimes makes us angry that He sees? Does it sometimes make us jealous of others? What does this tell us about nearness between God and Cain?
*God saw the offerings personally and cared about the motives of their hearts.
*God made it no secret what would please Him and what would not. He wasn't tricky.
*God spoke audibly to Cain after his heart was downcast, with an explanation and a warning.
After Cain killed Abel, a couple other touch points happened between Cain and God. God gives the punishment that Cain will be a restless wanderer, no longer having any luck with farming, and driven from the presence of the Lord. Cain's response is of course despair and he specifically says in verse 13 & 14, "My punishment is more than I can bear. Today you are driving me from the land, and I will be hidden from Your presence." That was no small thing to Cain. He was heartbroken over it. Despite the first murderer in history's actions, this man had a relationship with God! And the last thing God says to him is, "I will protect you." He puts a mark on his head so no one would kill him. A Father showing discipline and mercy at the same time.
I am always saying when we come to a worship gathering, it's not about the music...and it's not. It's about meeting with Almighty God and spending time with Him. When we come together to sing, or when we go alone in prayer, or just as we focus our minds on awareness of Him throughout the day, we are exercising the most awesome privileges in history because we are welcomed into the presence of God, where our hearts will be seen and personally known. He will speak, He will ask things of us, and we will have a chance to respond. He is a loving Father with a perfect balance of discipline and mercy, and because of Jesus, if we accept Him, we would never lose His friendship.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Living Love Story, Week 1: Adam & Eve
I am really excited about the year ahead of us as we seek God's Word together! My hope is to have 52 living love stories from Genesis and beyond. One of my favorite scriptures is Ephesians 2:13, which declares that we who once were far away are now brought near through the blood of Jesus! Yes, our hearts should do a somersault! As a worshipper, there are a few things that really ignite my passion for the Lord, and being brought near to God through the precious blood of Jesus poured out for me is one of those things.
This first love story reminds us of why we need that precious blood, why we are so indebted to our Savior Jesus. The story weaving throughout scripture begins here...
Just in the act of creation itself, God showed personal attention and desire for relationship, but I want to spend a moment on just two details. One, Genesis 2:7 tells us He breathed into Adam's nostrils the breath of life. God could have commanded Adam's life into existence, but did He? Did He just speak humankind into existence as He did the other masterpieces? No, He got His hands dirty...literally. And once the man was formed from the dust of the ground, He bent down and put His mouth to face of the first man and breathed. That is intimate. I'm thinking: How many faces do you get that close to, close enough to breathe on? He didn't have to do that. God has always been about face to face encounters. God has always been about reaching us.
Two, after Adam and Eve had sinned, Genesis 3:8 says that God came walking in the garden looking for them. They were hiding because their sin had brought about an awareness...an awareness of evil, an awareness of how it feels to be ashamed and wish time could be rolled back--oh, how we all know that sickening feeling--and maybe even an awareness of how good they had had it. In having my own children, I'm flooded with sadness just thinking of the moment my girls find out about certain evils in the world...and worse yet, my heart breaks at the thought of when they are entrapped in their own sin someday. I wonder if that is just a tiny glimpse into the heart of God, how He felt that day when Adam and Eve lost their pure childlike innocence. And yet, He was still coming their way. Perhaps He came in the cool of the evening every day to talk with His friends. It doesn't sound from this passage as if this little stroll was a rare occurrance. This time, did He come to hear the whole story out of their own mouths? Yes. To punish them and cast them out of Paradise? Yes. We can't get out of that. God has never changed. He has never swayed on the standard of holiness and truth; He won't do it. But as we know, God would make a way--crafted entirely before the creation of man--that His standard of purity could once again be met by man. God has always been about finding us.
This first love story reminds us of why we need that precious blood, why we are so indebted to our Savior Jesus. The story weaving throughout scripture begins here...
Just in the act of creation itself, God showed personal attention and desire for relationship, but I want to spend a moment on just two details. One, Genesis 2:7 tells us He breathed into Adam's nostrils the breath of life. God could have commanded Adam's life into existence, but did He? Did He just speak humankind into existence as He did the other masterpieces? No, He got His hands dirty...literally. And once the man was formed from the dust of the ground, He bent down and put His mouth to face of the first man and breathed. That is intimate. I'm thinking: How many faces do you get that close to, close enough to breathe on? He didn't have to do that. God has always been about face to face encounters. God has always been about reaching us.
Two, after Adam and Eve had sinned, Genesis 3:8 says that God came walking in the garden looking for them. They were hiding because their sin had brought about an awareness...an awareness of evil, an awareness of how it feels to be ashamed and wish time could be rolled back--oh, how we all know that sickening feeling--and maybe even an awareness of how good they had had it. In having my own children, I'm flooded with sadness just thinking of the moment my girls find out about certain evils in the world...and worse yet, my heart breaks at the thought of when they are entrapped in their own sin someday. I wonder if that is just a tiny glimpse into the heart of God, how He felt that day when Adam and Eve lost their pure childlike innocence. And yet, He was still coming their way. Perhaps He came in the cool of the evening every day to talk with His friends. It doesn't sound from this passage as if this little stroll was a rare occurrance. This time, did He come to hear the whole story out of their own mouths? Yes. To punish them and cast them out of Paradise? Yes. We can't get out of that. God has never changed. He has never swayed on the standard of holiness and truth; He won't do it. But as we know, God would make a way--crafted entirely before the creation of man--that His standard of purity could once again be met by man. God has always been about finding us.
Monday, December 31, 2012
Happy New Year!
I absolutely love New Year. It is so much fun to start new ideas, put new practices into place, have a bit of a challenge. There are several priorities on my heart on a continual basis (actually more than I can really handle yet I will persevere by God's grace) but these are two extras for this year...
One of the things I'd like to do is a weekly blog entry that will go along with our worship set at church each Sunday. I blogged about this last week--I want to go through the whole Bible, pulling out the instances that God revealed He was all about intimacy between Himself and mankind. Characters, stories, passages, proof. I started it last Sunday, and I will blog this week about Week 1: Adam and Eve! My call to lead worship and sing/song write isn't primarily about music; it is primarily about revealing the heart of God to the world and perhaps even more so to the Bride that He is jealous for. I really hope that this 52 Sundays idea will be Holy Spirit written!
Another thing for this year is going to be quite a challenge, but I have a fellowship of ladies who are doing it together and that is GO SUGAR & WHITE FLOUR FREE! I really want this. I want it because sweets are too important to me, because my weight and health isn't good, and because I need to be free from the battle. Why total elimination instead of moderation? Because I've had 34 1/2 years to eat sugar moderately and I still haven't gotten it under control, and because it's just too serious and dangerous to play around with anymore. Blogs, interviews, and links to come on this!
I want to share this real quick...I ran across this little piece of paper in my Bible today. It was from when I went through the Bible Study "Believing God" at least 7 years ago. It said: "I'm believing God: 1) For victory in my every day life--schedule, balance, ministry, family, etc. 2)That He will accomplish in and through my life His perfect will, and my part in that plan, and that He would give me peace about it."
At that time, I didn't have peace or clarity about my life, but He really did answer that prayer! So my prayer for YOU and for all of us who are seeking a deeper walk with Jesus, is that we would have victory and peace in our every day lives, and have peace about our part in His plan. May the things we set our minds and hearts to be acts of obedience, because if they are, there is success in the journey. Amen, and HAPPY NEW YEAR!
One of the things I'd like to do is a weekly blog entry that will go along with our worship set at church each Sunday. I blogged about this last week--I want to go through the whole Bible, pulling out the instances that God revealed He was all about intimacy between Himself and mankind. Characters, stories, passages, proof. I started it last Sunday, and I will blog this week about Week 1: Adam and Eve! My call to lead worship and sing/song write isn't primarily about music; it is primarily about revealing the heart of God to the world and perhaps even more so to the Bride that He is jealous for. I really hope that this 52 Sundays idea will be Holy Spirit written!
Another thing for this year is going to be quite a challenge, but I have a fellowship of ladies who are doing it together and that is GO SUGAR & WHITE FLOUR FREE! I really want this. I want it because sweets are too important to me, because my weight and health isn't good, and because I need to be free from the battle. Why total elimination instead of moderation? Because I've had 34 1/2 years to eat sugar moderately and I still haven't gotten it under control, and because it's just too serious and dangerous to play around with anymore. Blogs, interviews, and links to come on this!
I want to share this real quick...I ran across this little piece of paper in my Bible today. It was from when I went through the Bible Study "Believing God" at least 7 years ago. It said: "I'm believing God: 1) For victory in my every day life--schedule, balance, ministry, family, etc. 2)That He will accomplish in and through my life His perfect will, and my part in that plan, and that He would give me peace about it."
At that time, I didn't have peace or clarity about my life, but He really did answer that prayer! So my prayer for YOU and for all of us who are seeking a deeper walk with Jesus, is that we would have victory and peace in our every day lives, and have peace about our part in His plan. May the things we set our minds and hearts to be acts of obedience, because if they are, there is success in the journey. Amen, and HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Monday, December 24, 2012
It's All About You, Jesus
God is so good. This is one of those mornings I needed Him to break through my "self" and teach me something that would make a big difference in my heart...and He did.
It's Christmas Eve and I do usually love the holidays, but with adrenal fatigue, not sleeping very well the past couple months, and also just being an introvert who needs significant times of quiet and alone time in between activities, over the past couple years I have more of a "hold on tight and get through it" kind of feeling about Christmas. This year I said no to several gatherings and opportunities. I've hardly done any baking or cooking. My shopping was done throughout the year so no marathon shopping days for me. But still, here in the home stretch of Christmastime, I am exhausted and not exactly feeling the love for this blessed season! I went to bed thinking last night that I might not make it to our big Mulhall Family Christmas Eve in Louisville.
This morning, Jack said, "You know, Lyndsay, the way we feel right now is like the way Mary and Joseph felt on the first Christmas. It's kind of appropriate that we are tired and things are crazy and it's just not entirely comfortable..."Then we did our family devotion from Ps. 118:1 -- good news! His love endures forever-!- and we prayed.
And all this culminated in me having such a peace that my expectations of how I will feel on Christmas, both physically and emotionally, is absolutely not the point. My comfort level at people's houses is not the point. For a few days, I surely can keep my eyes on the precious Reason for this season and turn my eyes away from how loud it is or how I don't feel good or how I want to go home a little earlier than I can. It's not about me.
I know of at least two families who have lost a loved one in the past day or two. This Christmas is not about them eating pie and being where they want to be. No one wants to be at a funeral home on Christmas. We'll be going to the nursing home tomorrow--ironically, a place I've grown very comfortable in! But there will be people there without gifts and without family. They don't want to be there. Tons of friends of mine and their kids are sick and probably won't get to travel and see grandparents this Christmas because of the flu.
Christmas isn't about us though. Whatever state we find ourselves in this Christmas, just like we are learning to do in our normal daily trials of life, let's turn our faces and abide in Christ.
It's Christmas Eve and I do usually love the holidays, but with adrenal fatigue, not sleeping very well the past couple months, and also just being an introvert who needs significant times of quiet and alone time in between activities, over the past couple years I have more of a "hold on tight and get through it" kind of feeling about Christmas. This year I said no to several gatherings and opportunities. I've hardly done any baking or cooking. My shopping was done throughout the year so no marathon shopping days for me. But still, here in the home stretch of Christmastime, I am exhausted and not exactly feeling the love for this blessed season! I went to bed thinking last night that I might not make it to our big Mulhall Family Christmas Eve in Louisville.
This morning, Jack said, "You know, Lyndsay, the way we feel right now is like the way Mary and Joseph felt on the first Christmas. It's kind of appropriate that we are tired and things are crazy and it's just not entirely comfortable..."Then we did our family devotion from Ps. 118:1 -- good news! His love endures forever-!- and we prayed.
And all this culminated in me having such a peace that my expectations of how I will feel on Christmas, both physically and emotionally, is absolutely not the point. My comfort level at people's houses is not the point. For a few days, I surely can keep my eyes on the precious Reason for this season and turn my eyes away from how loud it is or how I don't feel good or how I want to go home a little earlier than I can. It's not about me.
I know of at least two families who have lost a loved one in the past day or two. This Christmas is not about them eating pie and being where they want to be. No one wants to be at a funeral home on Christmas. We'll be going to the nursing home tomorrow--ironically, a place I've grown very comfortable in! But there will be people there without gifts and without family. They don't want to be there. Tons of friends of mine and their kids are sick and probably won't get to travel and see grandparents this Christmas because of the flu.
Christmas isn't about us though. Whatever state we find ourselves in this Christmas, just like we are learning to do in our normal daily trials of life, let's turn our faces and abide in Christ.
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
A Blog about Blogging
Ok...So I have an idea! I am really excited about it and hope I can keep with it. Sometimes I forget things I started. I have so many papers laying around to remind me what I'm supposed to be doing, but I eventually stop looking at them. But the idea...
I have had the privilege and challenge of leading songs at a church (Journey: A Community of Grace, in Louisville) for about nine months now. I'm seeing how my different gifts and experiences are being used now on a weekly basis; I'm seeing that leading worship is about way more than singing, playing, and keeping a band together. My strongest spiritual gifts are encouragement and teaching, and those naturally come out in the worship leader position. I have one task and it is from the Lord--I am to be a friend to the Bridegroom. As His friend, I am to hear His heart, declare His love, and urge the Bride into deeper fellowship until He returns. And that is why I call it a privilege and a challenge!
So the idea I have that I think the Lord has laid on my heart is to start at Genesis and go through the Bible looking for characters and stories that reveal God's heart for intimacy with mankind. Who really knew Him? What did He say to them? How does He show in His Word how He feels about us? Sort of as a side note, when it comes up in Scripture, I also want to include this thought: How is music - worshipping through singing and playing instruments, dancing, clapping, raising hands, putting prayers to tunes - useful in this intimacy with God?
Each week, I want to highlight a different character and passage of Scripture in this blog and then share that main idea also on Sunday morning. We come to church sometimes a little out of it. We come to every day sometimes a little out of it, do we not? We need something to stir our hearts and remind us of what matters, or at least I know I do! And what matters is nearness, communion, with the Lover of our souls. My prayer is that in highlighting these passages about deep and genuine relationship with God we will see a seamless living love story...and that we will choose to go all in, making it our story, rearranging life until it is truly His living in us.
I have had the privilege and challenge of leading songs at a church (Journey: A Community of Grace, in Louisville) for about nine months now. I'm seeing how my different gifts and experiences are being used now on a weekly basis; I'm seeing that leading worship is about way more than singing, playing, and keeping a band together. My strongest spiritual gifts are encouragement and teaching, and those naturally come out in the worship leader position. I have one task and it is from the Lord--I am to be a friend to the Bridegroom. As His friend, I am to hear His heart, declare His love, and urge the Bride into deeper fellowship until He returns. And that is why I call it a privilege and a challenge!
So the idea I have that I think the Lord has laid on my heart is to start at Genesis and go through the Bible looking for characters and stories that reveal God's heart for intimacy with mankind. Who really knew Him? What did He say to them? How does He show in His Word how He feels about us? Sort of as a side note, when it comes up in Scripture, I also want to include this thought: How is music - worshipping through singing and playing instruments, dancing, clapping, raising hands, putting prayers to tunes - useful in this intimacy with God?
Each week, I want to highlight a different character and passage of Scripture in this blog and then share that main idea also on Sunday morning. We come to church sometimes a little out of it. We come to every day sometimes a little out of it, do we not? We need something to stir our hearts and remind us of what matters, or at least I know I do! And what matters is nearness, communion, with the Lover of our souls. My prayer is that in highlighting these passages about deep and genuine relationship with God we will see a seamless living love story...and that we will choose to go all in, making it our story, rearranging life until it is truly His living in us.
Sunday, December 16, 2012
In-between Advents
Today we had a precious family day. It started by going to church and worshipping the King...the baby in the manger who grew up to become the man of sorrows...the One who will return on a white horse, His robe dipped in the blood of the nations.
This is what it looks like in-between Advents.
We celebrate His coming but we also fast and pray for His return. If ever there was a time of joy and sorrow intertwined, it is now. We're aware, painfully aware, especially this week, that Jesus came to bring wholeness but not all receive it. Joy and sorrow. And we also become aware, as we should remain, that God is holding back His justice and wrath for the day Isaiah tells us of, when He returns this time a powerful warrior setting up a Kingdom we can see with our own eyes. Again, joy and sorrow.
As a worship leader, Advent is not an easy thing to lead through because it's a celebration of God coming in the flesh as a living love story but it's also the careful waiting for His return, the sitting on the edge of our seat trying to not lose sight of our hope in His heart for justice! Sometimes it takes a tragedy for us to really wake up to our need for His return. Sometimes it takes a glimpse of darkness to snap us out of our stupor of whatever we were thinking about and making our lives about that had so very little to do with the heart cry of God.
But this is what it looks like in-between Advents. This is the place in history we find ourselves. We have to get adjusted in this seat of sorrow and joy forever intertwined because they will not be separated until the King returns. Why do I harp on this so much? I know I have been saying the same thing for years, in blogs, songs, conversations, prayer. I harp on it so much because I think that if the Church can get adjusted to this seat of joy and sorrow, this harmony of shout-out-loud thankfulness for His first coming and steady commitment to whatever is on His heart in His second coming, we will be poised to truly be His hands and feet here. We won't be confused and wading through the dark, blending in with the world in every way. We will have correct, Biblical expectations regarding our health, our families, our safety, our money, and our callings, talents, and careers. We will understand we are not here for ourselves, to make a sweet little life and a good little name. We will not forget that we are strangers here, and here for a purpose that we might not even get to see or understand because it isn't for us.
Understanding, embracing, expecting this...it changes the heart over time. What will the heart of the church look like if this change occurs? I believe we will see a gratefulness for every little blessing, every tiny little gift like a pink sunset or a good piece of fruit will be a surprise that we realize we didn't deserve. I believe we will have willingness instead of fear regarding losing our earthly possessions and comforts and even our lives, because we are so attached to our unseen Home. We will just think, "Oh the joy of having One Thing that can never be taken from me." And lastly I believe we will have a generosity and openness like we have only seen in lives such as the great missionaries, some still living, many who have gone before us.
Jesus, we know You have promised to be with us...Your first coming changes everything. Help us first embrace that! And secondly, help us daily dwell with You, whatever You walk us through to the end.
Friday, December 14, 2012
A Slow Life
I am so grateful that I am able to stay home with my children and that we chose to homeschool. Not for the reason you might think, after what happened today in Connecticut...but because of this:
We live a slow life. We look each other in the eyes over and over, every day. We're kind of crazy about each other, and we say so. We write down the things the kids say. We take pictures every day. There's no way the girls and I couldn't know that the man of the house loves us and thinks we are beautiful.
I know of no other way to breathe in the days than being home together...studying what we feel is important and on a higher grade level, too...eating (usually) meals together each night that I can feel good about...not feeling rushed to get to bed.
The slow life allows for top priorities to be met. It makes room for scripture and prayer time as a family. It makes room for personal quiet times to be developed. It makes room for exercise, art, music, and strategic relationships. And it allows for days where we don't feel all that energetic and we just want to stay in our jammies. It allows for afternoons playing in the mud with the dog! It allows for TIME. A precious commodity.
I don't know how my girls will choose to live their lives when they grow up. They may become fast paced driven business women, and that's probably a fun option. Some people are made for that, and that feels like a life of no regrets to them! That's cool! It takes us all to make this global community work. But I feel very blessed to get a CHOICE of how I'm going to live my life and run my household.
As I was walking today, I was just thinking what a wonderful, remarkable (thanks to the Lord and my family and friends) life I have had. Sometimes I get bummed that certain parts of my life are over, or at least feel over for the time being. Each season of my life I have been wholeheartedly present, but never more so than now. This season of family...it's the most challenging but the most precious. It's worth fighting for. It's worth fighting the ways of this world for. I'm learning to love and persevere. I'm learning to pray and not just think and say that I pray. I'm teaching my girls some things in our calendar have to go so that more important things have space to expand...
Breathe in our lungs, Spirit of God, and let our lives truly be for You. I'm not saying I know how to do that...but I want to be still enough to see You move, quiet enough to hear You speak, slow enough to sense Your heart.
We live a slow life. We look each other in the eyes over and over, every day. We're kind of crazy about each other, and we say so. We write down the things the kids say. We take pictures every day. There's no way the girls and I couldn't know that the man of the house loves us and thinks we are beautiful.
I know of no other way to breathe in the days than being home together...studying what we feel is important and on a higher grade level, too...eating (usually) meals together each night that I can feel good about...not feeling rushed to get to bed.
The slow life allows for top priorities to be met. It makes room for scripture and prayer time as a family. It makes room for personal quiet times to be developed. It makes room for exercise, art, music, and strategic relationships. And it allows for days where we don't feel all that energetic and we just want to stay in our jammies. It allows for afternoons playing in the mud with the dog! It allows for TIME. A precious commodity.
I don't know how my girls will choose to live their lives when they grow up. They may become fast paced driven business women, and that's probably a fun option. Some people are made for that, and that feels like a life of no regrets to them! That's cool! It takes us all to make this global community work. But I feel very blessed to get a CHOICE of how I'm going to live my life and run my household.
As I was walking today, I was just thinking what a wonderful, remarkable (thanks to the Lord and my family and friends) life I have had. Sometimes I get bummed that certain parts of my life are over, or at least feel over for the time being. Each season of my life I have been wholeheartedly present, but never more so than now. This season of family...it's the most challenging but the most precious. It's worth fighting for. It's worth fighting the ways of this world for. I'm learning to love and persevere. I'm learning to pray and not just think and say that I pray. I'm teaching my girls some things in our calendar have to go so that more important things have space to expand...
Breathe in our lungs, Spirit of God, and let our lives truly be for You. I'm not saying I know how to do that...but I want to be still enough to see You move, quiet enough to hear You speak, slow enough to sense Your heart.
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Were Our Hearts Not Burning?
I love the story in the Bible about the Emmaus road (Luke 24). How Jesus was walking with these disciples, these disciples who were confused and grieved over the events that had just come to pass. They explained to him that this wonderful prophet had been killed and now his body is missing, and they just didn't know what to make of it. Some believed He had been resurrected, some didn't. These guys sensed that this was a dark time for which they had no explanation and they didn't have any assurance it was going to get better.
So Jesus spent time with them...Just as He had always done with people, He hung out. Being the very Word of God, He spoke the same truth He always spoke. He told the love story from the beginning.
And after breaking bread with them, they realized who they had been with, and asked each other, "Were our hearts not burning within us?" Were our hearts...not...burning...within us?
Jesus' Spirit dwells in us. He has moved in. He is who He says He is in His Word, and the story is beyond my fairy tale dreams! This is for real. He loves us and wants to walk this road with us, every step of the way. Are our hearts not burning within us in acknowledgement of this reality? Burning with thankfulness...joy...desire for greater depth?
Sometimes when something big happens to someone that we don't know very well (but could have), don't we wish we knew them better? If it's a bad situation, we wish we were in their inner circle so we could minister to them in a meaningful way. If it's a good situation, we can celebrate for them from afar but we're not exactly invited to the party. I think those Emmaus guys had hearts burning for relationship. They had been kind of on the outskirts, maybe onlookers to the whole Jesus story thing. Maybe they knew people who really knew Him though, and maybe they wished they had gotten in on it sooner.
When it comes to Jesus, there's no reason why some of us can be close and others cannot. Is your heart burning for relationship? Whether you consider yourself a believer or not, does your heart burn to get closer, to really get in on this thing? We're all in the same boat. We all need a Savior who will turn our face back to Him over and over again...who will lead us back to the fire of His love as our flames begin to flicker dimly out here...
I want to offer this last thought--Life is too short and people's opinions are too fickle for you to hold back and resist offering Him your ALL! In praise and worship, in sharing His love story with others, in using your gifts, and more than any of those things, in connection with Him in the quiet of your heart and mind, BURN! Burn all day and all night. Get close to the fire and you'll always have enough.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIQiOKcS_uU
So Jesus spent time with them...Just as He had always done with people, He hung out. Being the very Word of God, He spoke the same truth He always spoke. He told the love story from the beginning.
And after breaking bread with them, they realized who they had been with, and asked each other, "Were our hearts not burning within us?" Were our hearts...not...burning...within us?
Jesus' Spirit dwells in us. He has moved in. He is who He says He is in His Word, and the story is beyond my fairy tale dreams! This is for real. He loves us and wants to walk this road with us, every step of the way. Are our hearts not burning within us in acknowledgement of this reality? Burning with thankfulness...joy...desire for greater depth?
Sometimes when something big happens to someone that we don't know very well (but could have), don't we wish we knew them better? If it's a bad situation, we wish we were in their inner circle so we could minister to them in a meaningful way. If it's a good situation, we can celebrate for them from afar but we're not exactly invited to the party. I think those Emmaus guys had hearts burning for relationship. They had been kind of on the outskirts, maybe onlookers to the whole Jesus story thing. Maybe they knew people who really knew Him though, and maybe they wished they had gotten in on it sooner.
When it comes to Jesus, there's no reason why some of us can be close and others cannot. Is your heart burning for relationship? Whether you consider yourself a believer or not, does your heart burn to get closer, to really get in on this thing? We're all in the same boat. We all need a Savior who will turn our face back to Him over and over again...who will lead us back to the fire of His love as our flames begin to flicker dimly out here...
I want to offer this last thought--Life is too short and people's opinions are too fickle for you to hold back and resist offering Him your ALL! In praise and worship, in sharing His love story with others, in using your gifts, and more than any of those things, in connection with Him in the quiet of your heart and mind, BURN! Burn all day and all night. Get close to the fire and you'll always have enough.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIQiOKcS_uU
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
A Day Without Time
A few days ago, I had a little homeschoolin' momma/house wife epiphany. What if I could do my days without time?
Some days there are things we have to go to at a certain time, but actually, that's not the norm for me and my kids. We protect our days and evenings, because of my fatigue and sleep situation, but also because we want to not be running around busy. We want to be intentional in what we're doing, who we're with...
For me, this means that I get up when I get up (within reason, there is an alarm clock set at the latest possible waking time!) Then I have a little list of things I want to do, each taking between 5 and 15 minutes. It has been so awesome to actually do these first thing in the morning instead of wearing out and not having time for it later in the day. Here's my personally muy importante steps: Open the Word and spend some time in reading, specific prayer, giving thanks. Make the bed. Grab the mini-vac and clean up a little dog hair! (So simple but it makes me really happy to not have to see it all day!) Hit the mat and do a few stretches and exercises. (Don't be impressed, we're talking 5 minutes here.) Put on clothes and shoes and coat and take the dog for a romp outside right in front of our house since the kids are home. AH. So many issues taken care of head on! All this time, the girls have a list of things they can be doing on their own to help their day run smoothly. For all you morning people who are thinking, "Lyn, where's the epiphany? This is what normal people do..." I am telling you, I am not normal!
Then it's some hot tea and breakfast, and school with Selah/Yemi however long it takes. Because we ate breakfast whenever, then lunch can be eaten when school is done (because we would never ever do schoolwork for longer than 3 hours). Lunch is simple and we get at least 3 of our F & V servings in. After lunch, I just want to play and spend time with my kids. I fail at this A LOT. When they're playing or watching a show, I do work...but I want to change that. I remind myself there is time for that later. So when we're tired of playing, a snack and then it's what I like to call Soul Restoration time. We go to our rooms and do our thing...Sleep, chill, play quietly...For me, I might rest, blog, sing, spend more time in the Word, exercise. All good things for my little introvert soul. This is usually when Selah has her quiet time, but she might start having it first thing since she'll have some free time then.
When we're done with that, we need to focus on housework and cooking dinner. I think my kids should have things they can do to help. Working on that. We eat supper with a devotion, do game night or movie night or just hang out, and then it's been dark for a little while already and it's time to go to bed! After they go to bed, Jack and I are so blessed to have some time to chill...and not looking at the clock, when I feel tired and sleepy I am not fighting it. It's fun to get in bed and see what time it is. :)
Some days there are things we have to go to at a certain time, but actually, that's not the norm for me and my kids. We protect our days and evenings, because of my fatigue and sleep situation, but also because we want to not be running around busy. We want to be intentional in what we're doing, who we're with...
For me, this means that I get up when I get up (within reason, there is an alarm clock set at the latest possible waking time!) Then I have a little list of things I want to do, each taking between 5 and 15 minutes. It has been so awesome to actually do these first thing in the morning instead of wearing out and not having time for it later in the day. Here's my personally muy importante steps: Open the Word and spend some time in reading, specific prayer, giving thanks. Make the bed. Grab the mini-vac and clean up a little dog hair! (So simple but it makes me really happy to not have to see it all day!) Hit the mat and do a few stretches and exercises. (Don't be impressed, we're talking 5 minutes here.) Put on clothes and shoes and coat and take the dog for a romp outside right in front of our house since the kids are home. AH. So many issues taken care of head on! All this time, the girls have a list of things they can be doing on their own to help their day run smoothly. For all you morning people who are thinking, "Lyn, where's the epiphany? This is what normal people do..." I am telling you, I am not normal!
Then it's some hot tea and breakfast, and school with Selah/Yemi however long it takes. Because we ate breakfast whenever, then lunch can be eaten when school is done (because we would never ever do schoolwork for longer than 3 hours). Lunch is simple and we get at least 3 of our F & V servings in. After lunch, I just want to play and spend time with my kids. I fail at this A LOT. When they're playing or watching a show, I do work...but I want to change that. I remind myself there is time for that later. So when we're tired of playing, a snack and then it's what I like to call Soul Restoration time. We go to our rooms and do our thing...Sleep, chill, play quietly...For me, I might rest, blog, sing, spend more time in the Word, exercise. All good things for my little introvert soul. This is usually when Selah has her quiet time, but she might start having it first thing since she'll have some free time then.
When we're done with that, we need to focus on housework and cooking dinner. I think my kids should have things they can do to help. Working on that. We eat supper with a devotion, do game night or movie night or just hang out, and then it's been dark for a little while already and it's time to go to bed! After they go to bed, Jack and I are so blessed to have some time to chill...and not looking at the clock, when I feel tired and sleepy I am not fighting it. It's fun to get in bed and see what time it is. :)
Monday, November 26, 2012
What I Am Thankful For
November is almost over and I haven't written my thankfulness list yet...But I am ever and always pondering on the list, because it is long and I am truly grateful. Here are a few things I daily am thinking are lifesavers and lifechangers...
*My dear Jesus. He is my Life. I feel like I am truly blessed because I have embraced, fully believed and accepted, His great love for me. I am His Beloved and so I'm happy!
*My husband. He really accepts me for who I am.
*My darling little girls. They make me smile so much! They have a future of hope and destiny.
*Our house which is a home. This home enables us to have freedom to serve the Lord more. It's a refuge. It's our home base. So thankful God didn't allow us to move like I asked.
*Our vehicles, both of which were a gift! Wow, I know!
*The renovations and stuff we have gotten to do to the house this year, some out of necessity, some just because it would make our lives more functional and easier. The newest one is a fence. We don't have a backyard so the kids play in the front and I can't leave them alone for a minute; it's stressful. Now we are having a fence made...It's beautiful and a perfect corral for kids, friends, dog, whatever!
*Our extended family being near and wonderful. My mom watching the kids once a week so I can work.
*Oh, that reminds me...My church and part time job worship leading! Yes! God has surprised me with this blessing and I am growing in several ways through this opportunity to do more with music.
*Homeschooling, FAITH, and My Father's World curriculum.
*Knowing that in my least favorite season (because when I'm cold, my muscles get really tense and my skin gets really awful) I have a warm bed, home, hat, gloves, and coats!
*My friends!!! I am thankful to have so many people I can turn to for prayer, fun, talks, love! Old friends, new friends, they are from the Lord.
*And last...but not, well, yes, probably least, but still nice...Jack got a new computer and that means this laptop stays home now!! So great! That's why I've been blogging more, and it's a nice little luxury to have it when I want/need it.
So, happy belated Thanksgiving, and I pray we all remain in AWE and remembrance of all God has done for us.
*My dear Jesus. He is my Life. I feel like I am truly blessed because I have embraced, fully believed and accepted, His great love for me. I am His Beloved and so I'm happy!
*My husband. He really accepts me for who I am.
*My darling little girls. They make me smile so much! They have a future of hope and destiny.
*Our house which is a home. This home enables us to have freedom to serve the Lord more. It's a refuge. It's our home base. So thankful God didn't allow us to move like I asked.
*Our vehicles, both of which were a gift! Wow, I know!
*The renovations and stuff we have gotten to do to the house this year, some out of necessity, some just because it would make our lives more functional and easier. The newest one is a fence. We don't have a backyard so the kids play in the front and I can't leave them alone for a minute; it's stressful. Now we are having a fence made...It's beautiful and a perfect corral for kids, friends, dog, whatever!
*Our extended family being near and wonderful. My mom watching the kids once a week so I can work.
*Oh, that reminds me...My church and part time job worship leading! Yes! God has surprised me with this blessing and I am growing in several ways through this opportunity to do more with music.
*Homeschooling, FAITH, and My Father's World curriculum.
*Knowing that in my least favorite season (because when I'm cold, my muscles get really tense and my skin gets really awful) I have a warm bed, home, hat, gloves, and coats!
*My friends!!! I am thankful to have so many people I can turn to for prayer, fun, talks, love! Old friends, new friends, they are from the Lord.
*And last...but not, well, yes, probably least, but still nice...Jack got a new computer and that means this laptop stays home now!! So great! That's why I've been blogging more, and it's a nice little luxury to have it when I want/need it.
So, happy belated Thanksgiving, and I pray we all remain in AWE and remembrance of all God has done for us.
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Forgiveness
I think that in accepting ourselves, our pasts, our ups and downs, we grow a greater capacity to accept others. As much as it goes against my natural grain, I am learning to look at my own life and my own failures and what I lack personally and just kinda say, "Yep. That's what it is." With a bit of humor, with a bit of hope, and with a lot of acceptance of the fact that not every loose end is going to be tied up nicely and not every relationship is going to stay strong and not every goal is going to be realized. We can just be. And when we come to that place for ourselves, it's pretty neat how we can feel a peace and acceptance about how others have wronged or disappointed or even sinned against us.
In forgiveness, it doesn't mean we are agreeing with those people or saying we are happy those situations happened. It isn't saying, "Oh, I understand why you did that" or even "It's okay." Forgiveness, I think, just means that we are letting those people, ourselves, even our judgement toward God Himself, off the hook. We hold people up on this hook, we do. Call it a grudge, call it self protection, but we have people on our hook. And at any point, we can let them off of it. We can say, "I no longer condemn you for that" and we take them to and leave them with our Father who will deal with them however He sees fit. Wouldn't you want someone to do that for you? Set you free from their hook, with all the baggage, miscommunication, events preceding the conflict, that came with it? For someone to take me off their hook, love me despite what I may deserve, and carry me to Jesus in the privacy of their own prayer life and let Him deal with me how He sees fit, my hands off...I think that's Kingdom living.
Also, in forgiveness, I think we come to the place where we realize we are capable of just about anything. Given the right (or should I say wrong) circumstances, upbringing, indoctrination, pain, sleeplessness, and the list could go on, I must realize I am capable of the very worst. I'm capable of thinking I deserve something more than someone else and there selfishness breeds...I have no love, no patience, no kindness without the Lord constantly being my Source...I can be angry, prideful, and hateful, and not only can I be, I have been! This realization that we all come to, friends, is called humility. It's called agreeing with the reality of what is. It's not giving up on being who God has called us to be, it's simply living in gratefulness and awareness of His grace... and our daily need for it.
Life is just too short. Sometimes you just have to say, "Bless your heart...I'm moving on...Thanks for this opportunity for me to learn about giving grace from the Well of grace I've received."
In forgiveness, it doesn't mean we are agreeing with those people or saying we are happy those situations happened. It isn't saying, "Oh, I understand why you did that" or even "It's okay." Forgiveness, I think, just means that we are letting those people, ourselves, even our judgement toward God Himself, off the hook. We hold people up on this hook, we do. Call it a grudge, call it self protection, but we have people on our hook. And at any point, we can let them off of it. We can say, "I no longer condemn you for that" and we take them to and leave them with our Father who will deal with them however He sees fit. Wouldn't you want someone to do that for you? Set you free from their hook, with all the baggage, miscommunication, events preceding the conflict, that came with it? For someone to take me off their hook, love me despite what I may deserve, and carry me to Jesus in the privacy of their own prayer life and let Him deal with me how He sees fit, my hands off...I think that's Kingdom living.
Also, in forgiveness, I think we come to the place where we realize we are capable of just about anything. Given the right (or should I say wrong) circumstances, upbringing, indoctrination, pain, sleeplessness, and the list could go on, I must realize I am capable of the very worst. I'm capable of thinking I deserve something more than someone else and there selfishness breeds...I have no love, no patience, no kindness without the Lord constantly being my Source...I can be angry, prideful, and hateful, and not only can I be, I have been! This realization that we all come to, friends, is called humility. It's called agreeing with the reality of what is. It's not giving up on being who God has called us to be, it's simply living in gratefulness and awareness of His grace... and our daily need for it.
Life is just too short. Sometimes you just have to say, "Bless your heart...I'm moving on...Thanks for this opportunity for me to learn about giving grace from the Well of grace I've received."
Saturday, November 24, 2012
My Whole Life
Happy belated Thanksgiving, everyone! We had a beautiful day with family. One of our family traditions at the Mulhalls (my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, second cousins, there are about 80 of us) is to stand in a big circle and say what we are thankful for. Selah thanked God for her parents, Grandy and GP, and her little sister, and said her life was wonderful. I thanked God for His Word, which has been such a foundation and refuge this year, for my solid and awesome parents, and for my husband and girls! Jack thanked God for how real He has been to us through the passing of his mom. And Yemi sort of took the cake...She said, "And I bless You, God, for my whole life."
And I bless You, God, for my whole life.
I get very swayed by my feelings. By my tasks and chores. By my frustrations about the house being dirty, my allergies going berserk, feeling too busy or too lazy. Feeling too alone or too overwhelmed with people, making plans and lists in hope of not making the same mistake twice. I often think about my past 34 years, or the 20 I remember well, and I feel sad about mistakes and some relationships, but I also feel so thankful for the stability and chances that I've had. I look ahead and think all kinds of crazy thoughts, like "I want to adopt more kids and focus just on raising a family" or the polar opposite, "Let's send these kids to school and we'll embark on a whole new world of work." Sure, these thoughts are real...these feelings are real...but they just aren't that important. My "whole life" just is what it is. And it is so much to hold deep gratitude for.
I can be thankful for the craziness...the times I lose balance...the running back to Truth...forgiveness and understanding of loved ones...new starts...what is instead of just what will be. I feel a renewed hope to just be what I am where I am, and I needed that. I tend to be an overachiever, and I need to take a deep breath every day and see what God has put in my lap and not try to create more. I made a list the other day (of course) of the basic necessities of my day. Since then, I haven't fulfilled all of them in one day but I truly believe that for my mental, emotional, spiritual, social, physical health, I should prioritize these things most days of the week. It's going to take some work and self-control, but in order to have the life I believe God wants for me, I have to put first things first. Those things are my "what is"...and everything else just may not be meant to be.
I bless you, God, for my whole life.
And I bless You, God, for my whole life.
I get very swayed by my feelings. By my tasks and chores. By my frustrations about the house being dirty, my allergies going berserk, feeling too busy or too lazy. Feeling too alone or too overwhelmed with people, making plans and lists in hope of not making the same mistake twice. I often think about my past 34 years, or the 20 I remember well, and I feel sad about mistakes and some relationships, but I also feel so thankful for the stability and chances that I've had. I look ahead and think all kinds of crazy thoughts, like "I want to adopt more kids and focus just on raising a family" or the polar opposite, "Let's send these kids to school and we'll embark on a whole new world of work." Sure, these thoughts are real...these feelings are real...but they just aren't that important. My "whole life" just is what it is. And it is so much to hold deep gratitude for.
I can be thankful for the craziness...the times I lose balance...the running back to Truth...forgiveness and understanding of loved ones...new starts...what is instead of just what will be. I feel a renewed hope to just be what I am where I am, and I needed that. I tend to be an overachiever, and I need to take a deep breath every day and see what God has put in my lap and not try to create more. I made a list the other day (of course) of the basic necessities of my day. Since then, I haven't fulfilled all of them in one day but I truly believe that for my mental, emotional, spiritual, social, physical health, I should prioritize these things most days of the week. It's going to take some work and self-control, but in order to have the life I believe God wants for me, I have to put first things first. Those things are my "what is"...and everything else just may not be meant to be.
I bless you, God, for my whole life.
Friday, November 23, 2012
Christ In Us
So...I am finding myself awake and angry in the middle of the night. In the past couple of hours, I have prayed and poured my heart out to God. I'm too tired to cry and I'm sure my words are more like knowing glances. He hears and sees it all...what a sweet God we have. And I sense in return that right after a time of intensity with the Lord and family (such as this past week, with Jack's Mom's passing) this is when the enemy is going to attack. He is attacking with several familiar swords...but I have some pretty decent armor myself, and I'm writing right now to remind myself of this fact.
I come to this place, in the face of my enemy: I will choose to love and I will rely on the Lord for that love. When someone asks me for apples, I will go to the Lord and get said apples and bring them to that person. So many times I have thought I knew what "God's will" was for me, and I would come up with neat ways to "serve Him." But right now, even in this place of sadness and raw honesty, I know His will, really, is that I learn to love in the most difficult situations with the most difficult people. If I can't choose to do this in the private realm, what hope is there for believers like me out there trying to love and serve in the public realm?
Is it fake? No, it's Christ in us. It's choosing to not live by feelings. It's choosing to somehow care about someone else more than we care about ourselves. Sure, there are boundaries...and this choice weighs on a person, it's really heavy sometimes to bear up under...and it has to be chosen every new day, sometimes many times a day. So many scriptures come to mind the very moment I begin to think I don't have to choose to love: Accept one another, bear with one another, forgive one another...The alternative is not an option.
I put on my helmet of salvation to protect my thoughts. No self pity allowed, no "I deserve..." allowed. I put on my breastplate of righteousness. Fill my heart with love to overflowing, that will be my protection. An overflowing cup physically cannot allow anything else to take residence.
I put on my belt of truth.
I put on my shoes of the gospel of peace! I will live out the gospel of peace.
I take up my shield of faith.
I take up my sword which is the Word of God.
Amen. Thank You, Jesus.
I come to this place, in the face of my enemy: I will choose to love and I will rely on the Lord for that love. When someone asks me for apples, I will go to the Lord and get said apples and bring them to that person. So many times I have thought I knew what "God's will" was for me, and I would come up with neat ways to "serve Him." But right now, even in this place of sadness and raw honesty, I know His will, really, is that I learn to love in the most difficult situations with the most difficult people. If I can't choose to do this in the private realm, what hope is there for believers like me out there trying to love and serve in the public realm?
Is it fake? No, it's Christ in us. It's choosing to not live by feelings. It's choosing to somehow care about someone else more than we care about ourselves. Sure, there are boundaries...and this choice weighs on a person, it's really heavy sometimes to bear up under...and it has to be chosen every new day, sometimes many times a day. So many scriptures come to mind the very moment I begin to think I don't have to choose to love: Accept one another, bear with one another, forgive one another...The alternative is not an option.
I put on my helmet of salvation to protect my thoughts. No self pity allowed, no "I deserve..." allowed. I put on my breastplate of righteousness. Fill my heart with love to overflowing, that will be my protection. An overflowing cup physically cannot allow anything else to take residence.
I put on my belt of truth.
I put on my shoes of the gospel of peace! I will live out the gospel of peace.
I take up my shield of faith.
I take up my sword which is the Word of God.
Amen. Thank You, Jesus.
Friday, November 16, 2012
Give Me Jesus
Early this morning, Jack came home and woke me, telling me that his mom had went to be with Jesus. On Monday, the doctors had made it clear that her body couldn't take anymore and that we'd need to say our goodbyes. We took the kids with us and not knowing whether or not she could hear us, we poured our hearts out to her. And after we had all spoken, tears running down our faces, we heard her voice. She said, "I love you...I'm gonna be alright." A day or two later, she was talking more--even asked for tea, her favorite, which her dear son was willing to go buy an entire gallon of :)--but we knew, she was going to be alright in a different way than ever before.
I think I can speak for Jack, even though he has more of a grief process to go through than I do, and say that we are truly amazed by the presence of the Lord, the peace that surpasses all understanding. Paul in the New Testament speaks so much about death...let me paraphrase a bit. He says: "If there was no resurrection of Christ and therefore no resurrection of believers, how pitiful are we? Do we really just have hope for this life? No way, Hosea. Death, the worst thing the world can throw at us, is actually total victory for us. We are going to cross the finish line of this life and at that moment stand in the unspeakably perfect presence of Jesus. Don't you feel your body groaning in this tent? Your new body is waiting, at the right time. So live your life with Jesus here while you wait and you'll have no regrets when your time here is done." And as Jesus said in the book of John: "I have gone ahead to prepare a place for you! Oh, how do you get there, you ask? Well, no one comes to the Father except through me. I am the only way Home."
So, I just want to say--If you are reading this today and you aren't sure what it means to live your life with Jesus here, or when someone dies you do not have anything to hold onto, or if you aren't sure that you will go to Heaven, will you please email me and let me hear your heart? There is Life ahead, and I want you to have it confidently and joyfully. I don't know how to make it through life without Jesus...and He died so that none of us have to!
lyndsaytaylor@mac.com :)
I think I can speak for Jack, even though he has more of a grief process to go through than I do, and say that we are truly amazed by the presence of the Lord, the peace that surpasses all understanding. Paul in the New Testament speaks so much about death...let me paraphrase a bit. He says: "If there was no resurrection of Christ and therefore no resurrection of believers, how pitiful are we? Do we really just have hope for this life? No way, Hosea. Death, the worst thing the world can throw at us, is actually total victory for us. We are going to cross the finish line of this life and at that moment stand in the unspeakably perfect presence of Jesus. Don't you feel your body groaning in this tent? Your new body is waiting, at the right time. So live your life with Jesus here while you wait and you'll have no regrets when your time here is done." And as Jesus said in the book of John: "I have gone ahead to prepare a place for you! Oh, how do you get there, you ask? Well, no one comes to the Father except through me. I am the only way Home."
So, I just want to say--If you are reading this today and you aren't sure what it means to live your life with Jesus here, or when someone dies you do not have anything to hold onto, or if you aren't sure that you will go to Heaven, will you please email me and let me hear your heart? There is Life ahead, and I want you to have it confidently and joyfully. I don't know how to make it through life without Jesus...and He died so that none of us have to!
lyndsaytaylor@mac.com :)
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